questions i would like to know the answers to

+ what is the black goo around the faucet on the kitchen sink?

+ why will the shower not drain?

+ oh god will i get into grad school?

+ if i straight up fell asleep at my desk, would anyone i work with even notice?

+ will i see the aurora borealis if i look hard enough?

+ will i ultimately regret buying a pastry bag and tips on amazon?

+ can i have an intern to put my laundry away for me?

+ or at least fold it? i hate folding.