Author Archives: Rachel

saying yes to m!ch!gan

Today I ate cherry salsa on cherry tortilla chips (???) and saw a dude drive by with his hand out the window, covered in a white handkerchief, shouting BOO! at passersby. Also there are no less than three “Oriental Health Spa” billboard advertisements on the stretch on 94 between Kzoo and Ann Arbor, and apparently around 3:35 this afternoon 88.3 FM was playing “Sitar Funk.” Only in Michigan, amirite ladies?


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this is just to say

I have found
a totally heretofore undiscovered health foods store
it was on
oakland drive
vegan cream cheese was forty cents less than at the co-op
plus a 10% student discount

money which
would otherwise probably
have gone to support
a local community-oriented store
with an active membership

Forgive me
it was perfect
so cheap
and such an impressive bulk foods section


with respect to william carlos williams and batia’s kitchen curtain.

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midwest success

hello! it is a languorous sort of saturday-that-feels-like-a-sunday in kzoo, i am making beans and reading a book called “white teachers/diverse classrooms” for my teaching class that consistently devolves into an enumeration of all of the famous and important sociolinguists my professor has worked with over the course of her career. (how many? ALL OF THEM.) the kitten is rolling around on the back stairway to the apartment and sort of running in circles chasing something imaginary. this week alone i will have been to three different readings, which i think is actually more than i went to the two years preceding this one, and including the reading that was actually mine and heather’s. last night my friend franklin and i told a really drunk girl in a bar that our names were dave and julie and had lived here for five years. she told me she liked my glasses.

mostly it is okay here! i don’t really know! i’m almost done with season 7 of the x files and i’ve tried out six grocery stores and five bars and one farmer’s market. (it is a good one.) the water pressure on my kitchen faucet is fucked up and, in a really touching and heartwarming throwback to highlandhaus, my apartment building’s wiring is so old that if i try to use my electric kettle after like 9 pm all the electricity in the apartment goes out. yesterday was riese’s birthday. also, my mother just sent me a bottle of electric stovetop cleaner in the mail. (???)

that’s all for now folks! stay tuned to see whether my students turn in the rough drafts of their paper on monday or not! also, enjoy this photo of my cat looking like an alien.


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silver and gold

hey-o! i have been here more than a week now, which is crazy, but also maybe not. depending on the time of day it either feels way longer than that or way shorter. in that time i have found space for almost all my dishes & pots & pans (not all though, there’s a bowl and a tart pan on the floor next to my closet) and have gone to five different grocery stores. i have had my own internet installed and collapsed a shit-ton of boxes. but what about my usually active and fulfilling social life? well, obviously, despite the fact that i moved here knowing only two people, one of them being a professor and the other one being married to a dude in chicago that she lives with when class isn’t in session, i have a ton of friends now, because i’m super socially adept. they are as follows:

  • landlord: small, orange-colored, about 75, named Bob
  • cashier at the mexican grocery, with whom i chatted about black beans, and we were able to come to an agreement w/r/t their tasting good
  • Sandra, the mentally ill and/or addicted lady who lives one street down and who has come to my door three separate times now and asked if i’m going to be around later and if she can stop by and so now all my shades are down because i live on the first floor and it’s almost impossible to pretend i’m not home
  • Brian (Bryan?), the Charter company employee who came to install my internet today. honestly he is probably my best friend here so far, we talked about whether he gets paid by the hour, how good my cup of coffee smelled, and where to eat italian food in kzoo.
  • Matt, the gregarious and customer-focused employee at grocery store no. 5. he gave me a sample of “roasted root vegetable medley” and apologized for being out of lemons.
i know, i would be jealous too

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hello internet! i am now writing on you from a different location and via a different, and for the time being stolen, internet connection. i hope it’s still as good for you as it is for me. mostly i’ve been hanging out and doing some pretty cool stuff, like unpacking boxes, collapsing unpacked boxes, not unpacking the boxes full of shit that i don’t know what to do with (extra ice cube trays???) and one time eating at a bob evans with my dad, which was weird. i’ve been to meijer two times and hope to never go again, and have cooked exactly one thing inside my tiny, childlike almost easy-bake 3/4 size oven. (it was broccoli.) so far this place seems pretty cool, especially since i don’t know anyone here really and therefore most of my social interaction has been with postal workers. (who seem cool!) there is a book arts center which i will go to next week and hopefully take classes at, and tomorrow i think i will finally venture to a cafe because i am a grown ass woman and i can pay someone else to make my coffee for me. what have you been doing?

also, batia gave me these for my birthday, which was neat. and terrifying.

And I found a really great picture of Bobby Seale eating breakfast. The end.


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jaane kyun

this is what my room has looked like for the past ~3 days:

I think I need to get rid of that ski jacket you can see hanging in the closet, I’ve had that since like 2004. Anyways clearly my entire life is an equivalent huge mess, and all I do now is eat scones until I’m physically ill and play the X Files on Netflix on my shitty connection and pack in between mild panic attacks. The good news is that I’ve had occasion to try many new and exciting ways to drink tequila! Also, duh, Jaane Kyun. I hope you’re all having great weekends!! xoxo, gossip girl.


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my life in gchat 7/27/11

things are slow while heather is on vacation, because she literally sings and dances and all the rest of us do is bitch about stuff on the internet. so far today, this has been a high point.

Also, maybe fried green tomatoes! I don’t ask for much.

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