dear internet, this weekend i went on a road trip with my younger brother from [parent a]’s house in pennsylvania to [parent b]’s house in massachusetts. it was fucking awesome. my brother is the best brother. it was such a good road trip that i stayed awake for at least 85-90% of the eight-hour drive, even though i frequently fall asleep on any drive over 30 minutes. here are the highlights:
pennsylvania: flat, kind of boring, we weren’t in it that long. stopped at walmart. i stayed in the car. um, i don’t know, the turnpike is ok.
new jersey: what the fuck even is this state. we got off the highway where a sign promised us a shell station and a Panera, and twenty minutes later the closest thing we could find was a sketchy gas station called “raceways” where the bathroom smelled like urine even from the outside and they had the same kind of coffee/hot chocolate machine that they had in my old dining hall in college. on the way back to the highway an old lady with red hair honked at us even though we were the only other car on the road. fuck you too, new jersey. thumbs down.
new york: okay. some bridges. way too many confusing exits, all of which are just labeled “towards new york city.” that seems unhelpful. nice job keeping traffic light over the tappan zee, though! also the toll-taker had pretty badass nails.
connecticut: kind of a high point. highways had green stuff on them, like trees or whatever, food and rations were plentiful and not far off the highway. much hummus was eaten in the car while driving the mercifully straight freeway. a little confusion as far as directions, because who the fuck knows which direction hartford as opposed to danbury is if you’re not from there, but it all worked out.
masschusetts: obviously the best. this was the point at which i fell asleep for a while because i had been awake for a full eight hours at this point, but the highway through worcester was exactly as weird/charming/weird as i recall. also, this was the state in which we finally got to stop driving.
my brother made four mix cds for our trip. they are as follows:
gangster beats: this was a rap mix. a little too much odd future for my taste, but aesop rock is pretty ok. also, jay-z’s hardknock life started playing just as we reached our destination, which meant we got to drive through our hometown blasting it with all the windows rolled down in an SUV. that was satisfying.
master beats: this was an electronica mix: flying lotus, aphex twin, etc. pretty good, especially when we left early in the morning and i wasn’t really awake yet. later on though it kind of made me feel like i was hallucinating. Me: “Is this one Flying Lotus?” David: “Yeah, you can tell because you feel like you’re floating.”
animal beats: this was all animal collective. i liked them more than i remember liking them, but keep in mind also this was playing at the point where i was dozing off a lot, so it meant a lot of waking up suddenly and worrying that i was in a car with an ocelot on PCP or something. mixed review.
epic beats (no stairway): this was all classic rock (plus pink floyd, which i don’t really consider classic rock.) i don’t usually think of this as something i like, but David has a point in that it is the ultimate highway music. also, though, the lyrics frequently make no sense?
burned toast, eaten for breakfast before leaving: was burnt, i am bad at making toast. also the jam we got from the amish people who run the buffet place used way too much corn syrup. hello, fruit is already sweet?
hummus, eaten in car with pita: had harissa in it, was awesome. my dad insists on refrigerating bread though, so the pita was kind of weird. whatever.
diner food in connecticut: OH MY GOD. the waiter was nice enough to inform me that the fruit salad i ordered was canned and not fresh, i ate it anyway. he did not inform me that the ‘side’ of home fries i ordered was the equivalent of at least 6-8 potatoes. and it somehow cost like $3?? David and I couldn’t finish it even between both of us. He ordered a grilled cheese with bacon in it, which I have somehow made it this long without knowing is a thing.
soup that my mom had waiting for us when we got home: awesome.
i think that’s all the important parts! i learned a lot about myself, like mostly that i’m really glad i don’t live in new jersey.