No, but actually. Moms are a pretty big deal; I know from my own personal experience, because mine is a rock star. In honor of this day, I would like to share Julia Ward Howe’s Mother’s Day Proclamation, originally delivered in 1870 (and obvs found via Feministing.)
Arise then…women of this day!
Arise, all women who have hearts!
Whether your baptism be of water or of tears!
“We will not have questions answered by irrelevant agencies,
Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage,
For caresses and applause.
Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn
All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.
We, the women of one country,
Will be too tender of those of another country
To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.”
From the bosom of a devastated Earth a voice goes up with
Our own. It says: “Disarm! Disarm!
The sword of murder is not the balance of justice.”
Blood does not wipe out dishonor,
Nor violence indicate possession.
As men have often forsaken the plough and the anvil
At the summons of war,
Let women now leave all that may be left of home
For a great and earnest day of counsel.
Let them meet first, as women, to bewail and commemorate the dead.
Let them solemnly take counsel with each other as to the means
Whereby the great human family can live in peace…
Each bearing after his own time the sacred impress, not of Caesar,
But of God –
In the name of womanhood and humanity, I earnestly ask
That a general congress of women without limit of nationality,
May be appointed and held at someplace deemed most convenient
And the earliest period consistent with its objects,
To promote the alliance of the different nationalities,
The amicable settlement of international questions,
The great and general interests of peace.
Pretty neat, amirite? Because moms are pretty neat! I spent this weekend hanging out with my mom and her mom, so it was very motherly. Mostly I just realized how much I genuinely like both of them, and how awesome and hilarious they are. They are awesome even on Mother’s Day, when it is our job to be awesome to them! For instance, my brother and I had totally serious intentions of cooking a great dinner for my mom, but somehow she ended up twisting things around so that we went out for fancy Italian – and she paid. What a lady!
My favorite gems from this weekend:
Grandma: I like that one lady on the TV; she’s so cute.
Me: Which one? In the green dress?
Grandma: You know, the little fat one.
Mom: Did I tell you I thought you had lupus last week? \
A round of applause, please!